Dark Horse Arts and Sciences

Since childhood, I was so much into the fantastic world of books. My mother would get books from her school library and I would finish them one by one until all the books were over. Sometimes I even completed them twice or thrice. I would lay on the bed in my Aai’s bedroom and keep flipping page after page, non stop, until my hands got tired of holding the book upright. Pupils in my school would spend days out playing and visiting different places, but I was more of a loner, the whole day in bed, just hanging out with a book and my own thoughts. I loved it. I would rather spend a holiday all alone by myself than destroying it with someone who didn’t care what I had to offer in a conversation. I also liked being with my Aai. She would watch some serial on TV and I would be lying there with my book. 

I used to read a lot of detective novels. I love detectives and the way they deduce, method of deduction as Sherlock Holmes calls it. The way they go through tiny details and draw conclusions out of nowhere, startled me back then. I wanted to be like them, smart, sleuth and confident. I also used to read a lot of king-and-his kingdom stories, especially Vikram and Betal. It really fascinated me at that point in my life. I can’t explain it properly, but it gave me some perspective in my life back then. 

I still spend days holding books instead of spending time outside with fruitless conversations. I like this, this silent, quiet life, devoid of external interference. I see guys hanging out with their girlfriends, I feel what a waste of time. They haven’t yet explored the fun and ecstasy of being alone in a room and doing whatever they can. But that thing also has its fun. But I would rather stay away from it. Even if I talk to a girl for some days, I feel like I’m being intruded on, like someone is trespassing on my personal property called solitude. So, I stay away from long term friendships with girls, as after a certain point they start lingering around you all the time, which is kind of annoying. 

But still, I haven’t had any girl lingering around me ever yet in my life. I haven’t experienced that part of life yet, so I’m not sure what to expect. That thing can also be a beautiful experience in itself if you get the right girl, one who will listen to you and one who at least understands you, one who can look beyond your impenetrable wall that you have built over the years, protecting yourself from the external disruption. 

Well, whatever it is, I am still stuck to books for my companionship. They have been and will forever be there for me, no matter what, unless the government start burning books like the Nazis did. I still prefer a cup of coffee with a book in my hand over going out on dates that end up being monotonous and fruitless. However, those days with my Aai watching TV and me, just being me, laying on bed with a book, flash before my eyes like some faded memory, a memory that cannot be retracted back in reality, only to be stored in some deep corner of my subconscious, often visiting me in my lonely hours, putting a smile on my face in those hours of utter monotony and malaise.